Heather L. Barmore
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    Change In Action at Babble Voices


    A Question From Your Childless Friend

    "You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance." ~Franklin P. Jones

    When you find yourself suffering from terrible insomnia just 48 hours before flying across the country, you will find yourself in a no good, very bad, terrible mood. Keep that in mind before you read further:

    My flight was from Albany to Baltimore. Baltimore to Oakland. I was already Grumpy McGrumpypants when the gate agent decided that my bag was too big and proceeded to follow me around the airport - including into the bathroom - in an attempt to get me to check my bag. I was just as forceful in my saying ‘HELL NO’ as she was in her quest to get me to give up my luggage. I finally relented because, whatever. There were eye rolls abound and muttering under my breath and general unpleasantness because no one is happy at six AM.

    The second part of my flight - Baltimore to Oakland - is a six and a half hour venture across the country. I have done the NY to CA thing on numerous occasions and every time I know that I am going a long distance I make sure to check in 24 hours in advance so that I can get my prized window seat. When it comes to traveling 3,000 miles I become anal retentive because, like most people, I am all about being somewhat comfortable.

    There we were sitting on the plane but still at the gate a few minutes past the scheduled departure time. A woman and her three children are the last to board. I am barely paying attention as the flight attendants move the family, swiftly, through the aisle. An announcement is made that only middle seats are left and the front door is about to be closed. I go back to perusing Facebook where I am, somewhat ironically, reading through a friend’s page and giving side eye to mothers judging other mothers and then mothers judging people who don’t have children. Imagine my surprise when I look up and the mother who had just boarded with her three children was telling her young daughter - about seven years old - to sit in the seat beside me. I was at the window and there was an older/grandmotherly looking mother in the aisle seat. Before I can say anything the little girl is sitting next to me and her mother is sitting directly in front of us.

    Here is my question: What would you do at this point? Would you protest and switch seats with the parent who didn’t seem that concerned about not sitting with her child or would you do what I did which was to shrug and fall asleep?

    Actually, the first thing I did was to sigh and avoid eye contact with the mother in hopes that she wasn’t going to ask me to give up my seat. After it became apparent that she wasn’t going to say a word, I simply fell asleep. My brief moment of bitterness quickly went away and the girl was very good during the very long flight. When she needed assistance with opening something and getting her seat to go back, I was more than happy to help her because it takes a village and all that jazz. I wound up running into her in the restroom post-flight and then at the baggage carousel where she pointed me out to her mom and then enthusiastically waved at me. The mom ended up being pretty chill about the whole thing and thanked me for my diligence.

    I realize that I was quick to be offended because I am used to parents being quick to jump and tell others what to do and was pleasantly surprised to have a mother be so chill and not immediately demand my changing seats. I have to wonder if more people would be willing to be nice to kids/families if parents weren’t so prickly. I can honestly say that I am never offended by children but by the adults who are supervising or ‘supervising’ as the case may be.

    So, parents, what is the proper etiquette here: Offer to move or go about my business? This inquiring mind would like to know. 


    There Will be Yoga 

    "Like other parties of the kind, it was first silent, then talky, then argumentative, then disputatious, then unintelligible, then altogether, then inarticulate, and then drunk. When we had reached the last step of this glorious ladder, it was difficult to get down again without stumbling." ~George Gordon, Lord Byron

    Stop me if you’ve heard this one before: I like wine. I like yoga. But, since we’re all friends here, the thing I really enjoy about yoga is the clothing. I will do anything that involves an elastic waist. Nothing like call of stretchy fabric to get me out of bed. There is also a sense of satisfaction when I am out and about in my yoga clothes and I’m like, well, yes, I am dressed like this because it doesn’t cut off my circulation but because I really did just come from yoga.

    Apparently my whole yoga clothes and wine drinking vibe got to a few people because the next thing you know I’m being asked to host a…wait for it…YOGA (cothes) and SANGRIA party during the 10th annual BlogHer conference in San Jose. If you are at the conference please come? Seriously. I have this perpetual fear that I will host a party and no one will show up and so I’m going to need you to come. If you see me standing in the corner awkwardly, well, that’s just how I am at parties. Feel free to say hello. And as my friend Morgan said, get ready to enjoy some social media under the influence.


    But wait! There’s more!

    Prior to the actual event there will be something that is even more right up my alley which can only be described as the most magical Twitter party ever. Grab some sangria (I, obviously recommend the Eppa Sangria for it's deliciousness and it's organic which means that I have an air of superiority while imbibing), throw on your yoga clothes and sit in front of Twitter for an hour. Basically, what you were going to do anyway but do it with me and several other bloggers who garner far more name recognition: Heather Spohr of The Spohrs Are Multiplying, Morgan Shanahan of The 818, and Jenny Ingram of Jenny on the Spot.

    So, to recap:

    1. Twitter Party tomorrow @ 6PM - 7PM PT/ 9PM - 10 PM ET with Me, Heather, Morgan and Jenny
    2. The Eppa Sangria Sundown Soiree sponsored by Eppa Sangria, Whole Foods and Soybu on July 24th in San Jose.

    Got it? Good. See you then.


    The One and Only

    Growing up, this is the story I requested more frequently than most. Though of course my mother will always tell it better but I'll make an attempt:

    My mother was eight on the day that my grandmother brought my aunt home from the hospital. My mother was to attend church with my great aunt and her cousins. Instead of going to church she opted to go out with her brothers and my grandfather to a Long Island beach. Because of course! If the men were allowed to have a beach day then so should she. While out in the Atlantic, one thing led to another and she was caught in a wave, pulled down into the ocean and almost drowned.

    After surviving that ordeal they all went home to my grandparent's house in Queens. My mother, having had enough of the ocean, decided to focus on land-based activity. She decided to head out for a bike ride. Remember that this all happened on the same day; the beach and now a bike ride. She goes out on her bike and is involved in a hit and run where she was the victim. A driver came speeding by and hit her on her bike. She awoke in the hospital with a broken shoulder and leg. She would go on to spend the rest of the summer in a wheelchair.

    So! Today is my mother’s birthday. I'm happy you survived your eighth year and got through a few more.

    Happy Birthday, Peg. I love you the moon and the stars.

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